New Year's Revelations

"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to." -- Bilbo Baggins to his nephew Frodo Baggins, from J.R.R. Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings.

Normally, the first month of a new year is spent creating New Year's Resolutions and working toward being healthier, more productive, spending more time with our families, being more creative, being more positive, etc etc. The goal we seem to aim for is to ultimately: be a better person.

But this year, I'm not buying into the mentality.

Instead, I'm choosing to put my focus back where it should be. On God.

I'm a missionary, so this shouldn't be hard, right? But, I'm also a filmmaker and writer and an aspiring actress. Finding room for God can sometimes be difficult. Especially, when I come home at the end of a long day and just want to curl up on the couch and watch a movie or read a good book. Or sleep!

Unrealistic Expectations

One of the reasons I'm passing on making a list of resolutions is because I often create an unrealistic goal for myself: learn ten new languages, take lessons in modern dance, ballet, jazz and hiphop, go to acting classes and take voice lessons, read 100 books in a year, write six novels, make twelve movies. Produce seven plays.

These are all good things, but in my hype and determination I shoot for the moon and don't even end up in the stars.

I'm not saying you shouldn't go for your dreams. Write the resolutions if it inspires you, but remember what's most important.

God.

All my life, I've been told the Big Story God had for me would be impossible without him. It made me feel important to God that he wanted to keep me so close and give me such a huge story.
I was going to star in an epic!

Then life happened. The journey started. The road got bumpy and I wished I'd listened a bit more to Bilbo Baggins who warned Frodo to keep his feet, because there really is no knowing where you might be swept off to.

What I realized is, when my focus was on the New Year's Resolutions I thought making the list was half-way to living that life and not only the start. I wanted it now as so many of us in the microwave generation do. So when it was harder and took longer, or even when I failed I let guilt take over.

My focus was on the impossible goal.

Not where it should be.

On God.

That's why this year, I'm taking a different approach. I'm not making the list of resolutions because I know if I fix my focus on God and getting to know him more I'll actually reach better goals and become a, truly, healthier person.

It'll happen by osmosis. Not because I don't still try to go for my goals, but because I will see all my goals through a filter of love and truth. I can still shoot for the moon and instead of only landing among the stars, I'll pass this galaxy and go to the next.

Do you understand what I mean? I'm not saying I'll get my goal or even reach it. I'm saying I'll discover the better thing. The richer life.

Unexpected Realities

When God told me I was to pursue acting and filmmaking, I thought that meant going to Hollywood. I thought he'd help me get my own star on the Walk of Fame.

I could see myself kneeling on the pavement and pressing my hands into the soft cement, with a crowd of fans and paparazzi taking my picture. And like most kids, I'd stand in front of my mirror, hold a Barbi or my hairbrush and thank the Academy again for my fourth consecutive Oscar for Best Actress.

And then God told me to move to Australia. I thought maybe it was just a detour on the way to Tinseltown. A blip, so to speak.

But, that "detour" has lasted almost ten years.

It wasn't until a few years ago I realized this wasn't the blip. This was the Big Story God had for me and I needed to stop seeing it as temporary.

It was then I looked back on the journey so far and saw how much richer my life was. No, I didn't have my own star on the Walk of Fame, but I had a family of filmmakers who I could trust and do life with. I was living as a filmmaker and actress and writer.

Not aspiring anymore, but doing it. Living it.

And when I looked closer, I realized time and time again, all the films I'd worked on, all the stories I'd gotten to write had one thing in common. They came about when I stopped striving to be a better person and when I focused in on loving God and getting to know this amazing and mysterious being who liked to create as much, and even more, than I did.

He brought them into my life.

When we put our focus in the right place -- on God -- there's more freedom for him to create the BIG Story in our lives, the epic adventures.

It actually makes me see Bilbo's comment in another light, like he was excited to tell Frodo to watch where his feet took him. Because with God, there really is no knowing where you might be swept off to. It's all part of the Big Story God wants to tell with our lives and it can only happen if our focus is fixed on him.

It was a new revelation and I want to dive in head first.

Are you up for the adventure?

Originally published on Christian Today.

Producing Powerful Motion Pictures

I must be crazy. Or insane. Probably a bit of both. Which is why I volunteered for something crazy and insane.

I'd like to say I feel a little like Katniss Everdeen, taking on the big bad Capitol, but I don't feel nearly as brave. Instead, I feel like a clown, trying to learn to juggle chain saws, while riding a unicycle on a tight-rope fifty feet in the air. In the middle of a raging storm.

Which would be totally awesome to witness, but pretty difficult to achieve.

Volunteering as tribute

So what did I do that's so crazy and insane? I volunteered, nay, asked to be the producer of our next feature film. Which means I'm now responsible to see everything come together for 90 minutes of film.

Oh, but it gets better.

It's an independent film. Which means there's no big company backing us, not a lot of resources and zero finances.

The struggle's real

I really am crazy and insane. And I love it.

Let me compare the journey to Star Wars for a moment. Everyone loved the original saga and I'm convinced it's because everything was done on a tight budget with limited resources. Half the programs filmmakers today take for granted didn't exist then.

In fact they were created because people like George Lucas had to think outside the box to get the job done.

Or another example, Peter Jackson and Weta Workshop. They had to think outside the confines of celluloid to fully create the world of Middle Earth and in the process they too created a new term for the film world. "Bigatures." Small enough to house an entire city within a warehouse and big enough to actually be used in a shot.

One of my favourite directors, J.J. Abrams did a Tedtalk titled The Mystery Box. He shared a story about working with Tom Cruise on Mission Impossible 3 and how he had to think outside the normal filmmaking traditions, to capture a ten second shot. I won't give you all the juicy details, because you should watch it.

But the lesson is the same.

The harder the struggle, the more powerful the film.

Well, this film is going to be quite the struggle to make. Which is why I'm loving how crazy and insane I am. Because it's going to be good.

Actually it's going to be a great adventure.

It's a hero's journey kinda thing

This next year is going to be insane and crazy. Did you catch that yet? But mostly it's going to be an incredible journey.

Anyone who studies story will know about Joseph Campell's Monomyth and how every protagonist experiences a call to adventure. Well as a filmmaker, my call to adventure was the idea of becoming a producer.

The next part in my journey is whether or not I accept the call and cross the threshold. I know there will be great days, bad days and days in-between where I won't know what to do, but that's part of what makes this a journey. An adventure.

Or rather, a life worth living.

J.M. Barrie, author of Peter Pan, said this, "The most useless are those who never change through the years."

I don't want to be useless. So I'm accepting the call and crossing the threshold. I really am like Katniss taking on the Capitol -- really what this means is I get to challenge myself, to see what I have to offer.

If I'm successful, then by the end of this year, I'll be sitting in an air-conditioned room, with the lights dimmed and my name splashing across the screen under the title "Producer". And when I see my name flash across the screen, it will be followed by a powerful film.

I've applied this idea to my world of filmmaking because I don't want to be useless in my field, but the truth is, it can be applied to all of life.

Every single one of us go on a journey.

Several in fact, and the more we choose the new world (new concept or idea) and step out of the familiar, the more we will grow as people.

So, how about it... you ready to produce something powerful?

Originally published on Christian Today.

Finishing Strong

My body is fatigued and my mind wanders. All I want to do is sleep. Is there some way I can turn myself into Sleeping Beauty and rest for a century?

But I'm not done and I want to finish strong.

That's a lot easier said than done.

I imagine I'm not alone in desiring to finish strong. So what is it that sets apart those who actually finish strong and those who only hold to the words and not the actions of it?

Ah, yes... perhaps that's the key - action.

Lights, Camera, ACTION

Take for example a film set. We all watch the behind the scenes of what it looks like to be on some of our favourite film sets. For me it was watching the entire behind the scenes of The Lord of the Rings.

Hours and hours of people in action. Passionately doing what they love.

It became my dream. Sitting on my comfy couch and watching them in bustle around on the screen. I wanted to join them.

But it's different to actually be a part of the action.

I'm in the final weeks of principle photography for The Out of the Woods Project, the second feature film from The Initiative Production Company.

We're a small, independent company, which means we've got to be all hands on deck when it comes to creating.

As the weeks have drawn on and on. Filled with early mornings and late nights, it's hard to keep motivated and to finish strong.

But this is what sets apart those who live to finish strong and those who just say the words.

We have to keep active.

As soon as we start delegating more than what we should, we become lazy. The ironic part is when we live our lives this way, we'll find we start getting bored a lot faster.

I believe the reason for this is because we aren't doing anything.

Designed for action

Did you know our bodies were designed for action?

One of my good friends told me once there's a muscle in our buttocks that is only activated when we run.

Think about it.

That means we're designed to run.

I remember sitting in a lecture about worship. The speaker told us that when we raise our arms in worship it actually activates chemicals in our body making us feel more peaceful.

Again it's an active thing. We have to raise our arms in order for our body to activate these chemicals.
I'm reminded of the movie Legally Blond and how Elle Woods knows her client is innocent. She says, "I just don't think that Brooke could've done this. Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don't shoot their husbands, they just don't."

It's like going for a hike and deciding to turn back when you're almost at the top of the mountain.
While my examples speak mostly about the benefits of working out, I think the principles apply to everything we do in life.

The more we are an active participant - especially when it gets tough or close to the finish line - the more we will be able to finish strong.

Because finishing strong also takes practice.

The more we follow through on the small things, the more we will follow through on the big ones.
When we don't finish something it creates a habit that makes us think we can get away with not finishing something else.

I don't know about you, but I don't want to create that kind of habit.

Here's to sticking to what I started. To being known for my follow-through.

For finishing strong.

Originally published on Christian Today.

Contentment might require more than we think

"Then something Tookish woke up inside him, & he wished to go & see the great mountains, & hear the pine-trees & the waterfalls, & explore the caves, & wear a sword instead of a walking-stick." The Hobbit, JRR Tolkien

I find myself googling exotic new places and wondering how long I'd have to save up in order to buy a ticket and go.

I thought something Tookish had woken up inside me, but it doesn't feel right. Doesn't feel quite Tookish.

It's because it's not the desire to adventure, but the desire to escape.

It's the loss of contentment.

Discontentment

I'd blame it on growing up as a missionary kid. We lived all over the place and even when we did
settle in Hawaii for ten years, we still moved around a lot. Changing apartments and houses every couple of years. But it's not the same, I was never running from something.

And now. I find myself living in a place I've lived for more than ten years, in the same job and I don't see it changing anytime soon.

There's a big part of me that misses the adventure of new places and new friends and an even bigger part of me that's terrified of a future settled in one place.

I can't help but shake my head at myself. I'm a filmmaker. Life is never the same. I never know where we're going to be shooting next, or what story we'll tell.

So why the discontented feels?

Vulnerability

I got my first clue a couple years ago, I sat down for an interview for another episode in our Making The Out of the Woods Project. Friend and fellow writer, Brenden Bell, asked me, "What's the hardest part about planting yourself somewhere?"

I had to laugh when he asked because it's something I feel like I'm still learning and as I stumbled through an answer it finally came to me.

The hardest part is how vulnerable I have to be.

Being vulnerable with the people in our lives is very, well, vulnerable. It's scary. It means they'll see me at my best but they'll also see me at my worst.

And what if they don't like me after seeing my worst?

But after more than ten years of friendship with some of these people I've realised something else very important.

They still love me.

Still call me friend after all the crazy years.

It's not been an easy road, the things I've struggled with, the losses I've experienced and my general drama queen status have not made it easy for them to be around me all the time, but they've still chosen to make an effort.

I remember one time when I was really struggling with self doubt. The director of our company came up to my desk and asked if I was ready for our meeting. We had no meeting scheduled, but I got up and followed him out of the room.

As soon as we moved out of the office I looked at him questioningly, he smiled and said, "I knew you just needed to get out of the office and talk."

It was a precious moment. He took the time out of our incredibly busy schedule to connect with my vulnerability.

This is something we need more in our society.

Both being vulnerable and sticking with people in their vulnerabilities.

Instead of flinging hateful words at each other and abandoning people because they annoy us or we just don't want that in our lives, I think we should challenge ourselves to stick it out. To force ourselves to keep walking with someone.

It won't just help the person we choose to keep walking with, but I believe it will help us to be better people too.

It won't be easy and there will be times when we want to just walk away, but if we hold to the course, we may just find that we change the world for the better and our Facebook feeds will be full of smiling faces of friends verses enemies.

It's a simple idea, but what if it could work?

Originally published on Christian Today.

Out of the Woods, Why Independent Film is Powerful

Originally published on The Independent Initiative

If someone gave me the “dream job” on ten different popular movies filming in the next year, I’d turn them down. Yes, it sounds crazy, but I find what I do now is more powerful.

I work in independent film with The Initiative Production Company. We’re still a young company, having been around for just under ten years. In this time we’ve produced two feature films, a documentary and countless short films. 

So why do I think what I do is more powerful than those ten popular movies and the “dream job”?
Because independent film gives me more opportunities to help the creatives around me grow in their talents and skill.

Our most recent film, Out of the Woods, which we’ve started a crowdfunding campaign for, is rife with examples of why independent film is powerful. Not only was it a great experience for me as a first-time feature film producer, but it allowed me to give real opportunities to other aspiring filmmakers and actors.

Maybe I’m wrong, but I’ve never heard of a film company who cared more about building up the next generation of filmmakers and actors over making lots of money. 

Real opportunities

During production of Out of the Woods, we ran an internship. We gave them real responsibility by placing them within the film crew instead of just being interns.

We created a live/learn experience.

As an example, one of our interns held the sole title of Unit Production Manager. Others held titles as 3rd Assistant Director, Gaffer, Concept Artist, 1st Assistant Camera Operator and many others.

This isn’t normal for a film internship.

But as a company, we believe giving them a real job is a better learning situation than just being the coffee getter or copy printer person.

We walked alongside our interns and treated them like part of the crew. Yes, we gave pointers and guided them in one direction or the other, but as our company is called The Initiative, we also encouraged them to take initiative and ownership of their role on set.

Being a stepping stone

We also brought on film school students from local universities, placing them in roles like Sound Mixer and Wardrobe Assistant. Creating a feature film opportunity for them and giving them much needed experience of set life.

A producer friend of mine, stopped by set one day and was amazed at the professionalism we’d established on set. Especially knowing the majority of our crew were interns and film students.

As a company, this is the heart of why we do independent film.

We want our company to be a real stepping stone for aspiring filmmakers to the world of the industry. It’s our hope they’ll be able to start on the bigger sets as something more than a Production Assistant.

We believe so strongly in building the next generation of filmmakers and actors, that all the funds we receive for our films go straight back into making that film stand out. None of us in The Initiative, make money on what we do. We’d rather see our story come to life and in the process create more set life experience for young filmmakers/actors.

Out of the Woods

It may sound a bit crazy to work in a company where we don’t get paid for all the hours of extreme labour and long hours which we pour into not only the film but those we train, but it actually opens doors for us to work with more creatives in the Brisbane area.

When they discover we’re doing this for the passion of it, it ignites their passion too. It creates an environment of like-minded individuals who put their all into a project because it’s a story worth telling.

It also gives everyone the opportunity to grow in their own skills and talents.

I love working with The Initiative Production Company.

I love that our focus is to be an encouragement and aid to creatives everywhere. I love that we get to give set life experience to aspiring filmmakers and actors.

I love that we continue to support those who come through our doors, by helping them find other jobs within the local industry and more. My job may not be financially beneficial for me, but the benefits I do receive through new friendships and adventures far outweigh anything else.

I can say truthfully, I am living the dream. We’ve created an innovative, tenacious community of film professionals, and I love every second of it.

We’d appreciate your help to continue to inspire young creatives by donating towards our crowdfunding campaign, Get Us Out of the Woods.