Friday, December 20, 2019

Christmas Stories & Fairytales




Once upon a time, I wrote a short story about a girl who wanted a Father because Father's are good at providing for their families and because the girl needed to be provided for. It was allegorical and fantastical in nature. The girl travels to Faerie and finds a Wish Box and wishes her father into existence.

I wrote it because I'd forgotten what my Heavenly Father was like as a Dad. I'd conformed to the world's idea and my relationship with Papa God was suffering for it. Especially in the area of provision.

It was winter in Alaska, and we were a couple weeks away from Christmas. I'd been lying in bed, complaining to God, when a sudden stirring filled me to write. It was already near midnight, but I crawled out of bed, and the comfort of warm blankets, pulled out a notebook and pen and began to write:

Ava watched the hail pound on the thin sheet of glass and wondered if the window would hold against the relentless assault. Far on the street below fairy lights danced in the storm, silent reminders of the Christmas season. Ava tucked herself back under the covers but couldn't lie still, the events of the day filled her young mind with worry.
Today, more than anything, she wished she had a Papa. The landlord had come and Ava heard him tell Mama that they needed to come up with this month's rent by next Friday or he’d be forced to have them evicted. She’d seen the look on Mama’s face and knew unless there was a miracle, they would be spending Christmas on the streets.

Within a short time, The Fairytale Child was finished, and I settled back under the covers, escaping the chill of the room, and fell into a deep slumber. Dreaming of my story and the revelations God had taught me in those wee hours about Him being a Father, especially one who provided for His children.

All this happened about fifteen years ago now. Strange to think I'm on a similar journey, and needing, yet again, another reminder that Papa God is a good provider. Funny how we sometimes have to learn things over and over again. I think that's why Jesus told stories because we can read them again and again and glean new lessons each time.

Other than reading The Fairytale Child aloud to a small group of women about fifteen years ago, who wept and thanked me for the powerful words, this story has been buried under a mountain of snow, aka - lost in a digital field of white and blue folders in my writing files.

That is, until one Australian winter day ...

At the beginning of the year, God spoke to me about 2019 being a year of renewing hope. Renewing my understanding, giving me hope for the Big Story He wanted, and still wants, to tell with my life and pushing me to join the adventure of hope by joining the world of indie publishing.

So, I toyed with the idea of releasing my novel, The Rose Of Admirias, as an indie author. But as I researched how to do this, I was soon lost in a world of new vocabulary and technology. And overwhelmed by how much editing my novel still needed. The whole process became daunting. Terrifying. And I found excuse after excuse to not follow through.

But Papa God was whispering to me, telling me to be brave. To hope for the future He had for me. Reminding me of little Ava and the terrifying adventure she faced one lonely Christmas.

Then a friend of mine released a short book as a means to gain more readers before they release their book next year. Something about this stirred me to action, and the next thing I knew, I was piecing together a collection of original short stories to indie publish. And Too Bright: And Other Stories Inspired By The Dreamcatcher's Journal was born.

https://www.amazon.com/Too-Bright-stories-inspired-Dreamcatchers-ebook-dp-B07ZWN8RW2/dp/B07ZWN8RW2/ref=mt_kindle?_encoding=UTF8&me=&qid=1572680241

And ...  

The Fairytale Child found a new home. A new place to shine.

As I began to edit the collection together, I was reminded of the lessons learned along the way. Co-creating worlds and characters with Papa God, weaving space operas together alongside high fantasy. Each story a creation, each story inspired by life lessons. Especially little Ava's.

The Christmas season is one filled with joy and celebration. But life's obstacles don't wait for holidays to come and go before bringing trouble, and for many, this season will be filled with hardship, tears, and heartache for the closeness of family, among other heavy burdens.

While it would be easy to allow the weight of uncertainty pull us down, we can find hope in the stories around us. Whether that be in creating a new short story, novel, or watching a film. We can look for God in every word and ask Him to teach us the important lesson Ava learned:

That night after Mama tucked her in, Ava thought of Papa and his promise to take care of them. She smiled, knowing he'd shown up today. He really was faithful.

Perhaps it's because it's the holidays, but I'm reminded of the hardships another family endured long ago. A small family who shared the warmth of a stable, while a chorus of angels sang of Papa God's provision to the world. Despite their difficulties of having no room after a long journey, I like to think Mary and Joseph,  still smiled and rejoiced while shepherds came and angels sang.

Only God knew this story would end at a cross, and yet He still sent his angels to sing, still planted a star (a thousand years in advance to that day) to shine for wise men to come and celebrate the birth of the King of hope.

Whatever you face this holiday season, whether it's the joy of being surrounded by family or pushing through a season of heaviness, I hope these glimpses of stories, some true and some inspired by true things, help you find new hope and new reasons to rejoice. And new stories of your own. Imagined and dreamed and created with the Creator. Because through the thick and thin Papa God is right there and always will be, a faithful provider who gives good gifts to His children.


Originally published on Christian Writers Downunder

Friday, August 16, 2019

What Your Daily Word Count Says About You

originally published on CWD

Yesterday I wrote 2,054 words for my WIP. At first, I was pretty proud of myself, but then I started wondering if that number should be higher for an almost full day of writing. What did my word count say about me as a writer? Was I good enough?

I’ve always wondered if I could actually make it as a professional writer.

I imagine my dream lifestyle - living in some majestic place, full of epic mountains, verdant valleys, crystalline waterfalls and soaring eagles. Someplace I could spend my days sitting in a wing-backed chair with my laptop writing all day long. Even if the “magical place” was just a dingy room and I still had the luxury of writing all day and making a living doing this, could I make it?

The fear that this is just a hobby sneaks in a lot.

Or that even if I do have the opportunity to make it a career that I’ll dry up and have no more words to say. Maybe I’m not alone. Maybe you’ve wondered too.

Well, after yesterday’s success, I was curious to know how many words the professionals write on a daily basis. My goal was to start writing the same word count as they did, because if I could do that, then I'd be a pro too, right? My word count would say so.

Famous Word Counts

Trying to google something like this was actually a bit more difficult than I thought, but in the end, I found one post that had a list of 39 Famous Authors and their daily word count. And it was much more comforting than I’d thought it would be.

Yes, there were authors like, Michael Crichton, who writes an average of 10,000 words a day! But the majority of these famous writers sat from 1,000 - 2,500 words a day. And another handful, Ernest Hemingway among them, sat around 500 - 600 words a day.

All in all, it was encouraging to know that some of the "Greats" sat so low on their daily word count.

But what did it say about them? Were they not as professional as others? Did they not take their writing as seriously as others?

This thought process reminded me of something even more important… It’s not how much you write each day, but that you stick to it and write something every day. Even if it’s only 10 words a day.

AND!

Even more importantly, it reminded me to not compare myself and my writing to other people and their writing. It's an easy game to get caught up in, but it will leave us feeling dissatisfied - even with the good things that happen. Take me for example, I had been proud of myself for how much I'd accomplished in one day, until I let comparison set in and take over that joy.




Every Word Counts


This last month, I took part in a writing challenge. It was simple enough. Write something every day. But with my busy schedule, this had even been too much for me on some days and it was easy to feel discouraged.

One of my friends, who was also part of the challenge asked me how I was doing and I told him it wasn’t going so well. I wasn’t the only one. There were a few others that were struggling too. Each time I complained, my friend James, reminde me of how good it was to at least be writing something. If I said I’d written something but wasn’t happy with the way it turned out, he encouraged me that at least I wrote something. Another time when I said it was going too slowly, he stopped me and said, “It all counts.”

Even something is better than nothing.

Write.

Get it out and on to paper or computer screen, whatever your preference.

So what does your daily word count say about you?

Well, let me tell you. It should tell you that you've accomplished something. You've put something out there. You've taken a step or several steps towards your end goal and you should celebrate that, be encouraged by the process instead of looking at the negative of it.

Be your biggest fan.

I was standing in line at an airport once and the man behind me had just been part of a writing conference in the city. We struck up a conversation about writing and when he asked me what I wrote. I started talking down about what I’d been writing and this man - this stranger, stopped me and said, “Don’t do that.” He went on to tell me how everyone else would critique my writing and tear it down, but I needed to be my biggest fan.

If you write. Do it and be your biggest fan. Enjoy the process and remember that every bit counts, whether you write only 10 words a day or 10,000, it all counts.

Each word you write is a step in the right direction, or to be punny: the write direction ;) 

Thursday, March 7, 2019

Dancing, bulls and God's tattoo's


A few years ago I wrote a letter to one of my favourite authors. I told him about my writing, never expecting him to respond, but hoping he would.

He did! Now years later his words still haunt me.
"As for your writing, I hope you continue to dance with the bulls."
These words speak of something I've let go, something I need to remember.

In the last month one of my favorite things has fallen into the background, lying under a layer of dust, forgotten.

My love for writing.

Excuses are like cancer

I've let my writing drift to the back burner. I've also stopped working out. I'm frustrated until I remember, it's not hard to see why these things have slipped into the background.

I am currently in the middle of production on an independent feature film. My roles on set so far have included Producer, Casting Director and 1<sup>st Assistant Director.

My plate is pretty full.

However, what I'm realizing is this is becoming an excuse.

When was Excuses invited?

Yes, life is busy. Good busy. I love my life, but I don't want all these wonderful things I'm doing to be shaded with the color of excuses.

If I continue choosing to let the busyness of life become an excuse then I will never get a book published, I will never reach my goal weight & I will never reach any other goal I set for myself.
Why? Because Excuses will rule my life & before I know it, I'll be 50 & wonder what happened.

New goal.

STOP making excuses. There will always be one. "Oh I'm too tired." "I'm sick." "I tried, but it never worked out." "I'll do it later, or tomorrow, or next week."

Excuses are endless and they seek to devour our life, but I don't want to let it anymore.

God has tattooed our hearts

When I read Divergent by Veronica Roth I was inspired to be like the main character Tris, who gets a tattoo of a bird to remind herself of the fears she's choosing to overcome.

I'm not gonna lie, after reading the book I wanted to go out and get a tattoo.

Like now.

Something that would be there for life to remind me of God's call, the one He put deep in my soul & tells me I am created for so much more than this.

That will inspire me when I'm tempted by excuses.

I already know what it will look like. A girl dancing with bulls. Even though those big, ferocious animals scare the crummy out of me, I'm going to choose to dance with them instead of letting my fear get the better of me.

Excuses aren't allowed, only dancing with bulls is welcome.

We can try to silence the call God has placed in us & we can throw every excuse in the book at it, but it'll still be there like a persistent badger, because He's already tattooed it on our hearts.

A forever mark of how we are meant to live.

It's His call to adventure, whispering "I've got bigger plans for you." The moment we let this call to adventure free the more God can show us how limitless we are when He's leading our lives.

With God, nothing is impossible. Especially when we choose to toss Excuses out the door.

New challenge.

Kick Excuses out. Choose the limitless adventure of God's call. Let Him remind me of the dreams & stories he's got me to tell. Put pen to paper. Get my running shoes on & get out the door.

Life is full of tomorrows that will never come.

It's time to run.

Thursday, February 7, 2019

Ancient Paths

Life is suffering. An up-hill battle, an adventure.

A constant struggling forward.

Lately the weight of life has gotten me down. I've spent a few nights crying myself to sleep.

Wondering what on earth I'm doing with my life.

On the outside, it looks like I have it all. I'm a filmmaker. Producing my first feature film. Working in an office of wonderful people, who I get to adventure with. I'm writing a novel and part of the worship team at church. I have great friends and a loving family. I have all the creature comforts I could want and am surrounded with good things.

On paper, I've got a pretty charmed life.

But the life of a creative is a constant struggle. And that's ok.

Because without a little conflict, life would get pretty boring. I don't want a life of all highs and no lows.

It's in the lows I remember to crawl back to my Papa and cry for his help. It's then I remember, I've got an amazing God, who is using every present struggle for the working of my good.

His plans are for our good

If there is one thing I can stress to those who are going through a difficult time. Even if it feels like that difficult time is always. On-going.

Do yourself a favour. Turn to Papa God. He's the only one who can meet you exactly where you are.
I've been listening to Bethel's new album, Have it All, and been reminded that when I focus on the struggle - I will be overwhelmed.

But if I focus on God and His phenomenal amazingness - I will overcome.

As soon as we tell God that He can, indeed, "have it all." That stress and worry. That frustration, it will lighten. I don't mean it will go away. I'm still facing a big giant, but my perspective has changed. I can't see the giant, because I'm too transfixed by the glory of my Daddy.

Walking the ancient paths

Jeremiah chapter 6, verse 16 says, "Stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls."

Oh that we would turn our hearts back to God and take those ancient paths.

Think about an ancient path for a moment. What does it look like? Where would it be found?

I imagine those roads are not easy to navigate. They're probably overgrown. Full of wild things. In hard to reach locations. Where only the brave and courageous can find them.

And even then, I bet they are hidden to the naked eye.

Ah. But don't you know? It is the glory of God to conceal things, and the glory of man to seek them out!

To search something out is not going to be easy. But, He's told us not to fear, because He's redeemed us. Called us by name, and said we are His.

If that isn't enough. He's also given us a promise.

"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you." Isaiah chapter 43, verse 2

"I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord." Isaiah chapter 45, verse 3

I don't know about you, but I want to find those ancient paths. I want to seek out the things God has hidden. To walk forward - through the struggles - and know there will come a day when the struggle will have it's work in me.

And I'll come out the other end a stronger person.

Both in faith and relationship to the One who walked me through it.

Thursday, January 3, 2019

New Year's Revelations


"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to." -- Bilbo Baggins to his nephew Frodo Baggins, from J.R.R. Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings.
Normally, the first month of a new year is spent creating New Year's Resolutions and working toward being healthier, more productive, spending more time with our families, being more creative, being more positive, etc etc. The goal we seem to aim for is to ultimately: be a better person.

But this year, I'm not buying into the mentality.

Instead, I'm choosing to put my focus back where it should be. On God.

I'm a missionary, so this shouldn't be hard, right? But, I'm also a filmmaker and writer and an aspiring actress. Finding room for God can sometimes be difficult. Especially, when I come home at the end of a long day and just want to curl up on the couch and watch a movie or read a good book. Or sleep!

Unrealistic Expectations

One of the reasons I'm passing on making a list of resolutions is because I often create an unrealistic goal for myself: learn ten new languages, take lessons in modern dance, ballet, jazz and hiphop, go to acting classes and take voice lessons, read 100 books in a year, write six novels, make twelve movies. Produce seven plays.

These are all good things, but in my hype and determination I shoot for the moon and don't even end up in the stars.

I'm not saying you shouldn't go for your dreams. Write the resolutions if it inspires you, but remember what's most important.

God.

All my life, I've been told the Big Story God had for me would be impossible without him. It made me feel important to God that he wanted to keep me so close and give me such a huge story.
I was going to star in an epic!

Then life happened. The journey started. The road got bumpy and I wished I'd listened a bit more to Bilbo Baggins who warned Frodo to keep his feet, because there really is no knowing where you might be swept off to.

What I realized is, when my focus was on the New Year's Resolutions I thought making the list was half-way to living that life and not only the start. I wanted it now as so many of us in the microwave generation do. So when it was harder and took longer, or even when I failed I let guilt take over.

My focus was on the impossible goal.

Not where it should be.

On God.

That's why this year, I'm taking a different approach. I'm not making the list of resolutions because I know if I fix my focus on God and getting to know him more I'll actually reach better goals and become a, truly, healthier person.

It'll happen by osmosis. Not because I don't still try to go for my goals, but because I will see all my goals through a filter of love and truth. I can still shoot for the moon and instead of only landing among the stars, I'll pass this galaxy and go to the next.

Do you understand what I mean? I'm not saying I'll get my goal or even reach it. I'm saying I'll discover the better thing. The richer life.

Unexpected Realities

When God told me I was to pursue acting and filmmaking, I thought that meant going to Hollywood. I thought he'd help me get my own star on the Walk of Fame.

I could see myself kneeling on the pavement and pressing my hands into the soft cement, with a crowd of fans and paparazzi taking my picture. And like most kids, I'd stand in front of my mirror, hold a Barbi or my hairbrush and thank the Academy again for my fourth consecutive Oscar for Best Actress.

And then God told me to move to Australia. I thought maybe it was just a detour on the way to Tinseltown. A blip, so to speak.

But, that "detour" has lasted almost ten years.

It wasn't until a few years ago I realized this wasn't the blip. This was the Big Story God had for me and I needed to stop seeing it as temporary.

It was then I looked back on the journey so far and saw how much richer my life was. No, I didn't have my own star on the Walk of Fame, but I had a family of filmmakers who I could trust and do life with. I was living as a filmmaker and actress and writer.

Not aspiring anymore, but doing it. Living it.

And when I looked closer, I realized time and time again, all the films I'd worked on, all the stories I'd gotten to write had one thing in common. They came about when I stopped striving to be a better person and when I focused in on loving God and getting to know this amazing and mysterious being who liked to create as much, and even more, than I did.

He brought them into my life.

When we put our focus in the right place -- on God -- there's more freedom for him to create the BIG Story in our lives, the epic adventures.

It actually makes me see Bilbo's comment in another light, like he was excited to tell Frodo to watch where his feet took him. Because with God, there really is no knowing where you might be swept off to. It's all part of the Big Story God wants to tell with our lives and it can only happen if our focus is fixed on him.

It was a new revelation and I want to dive in head first.

Are you up for the adventure?

Originally published on Christian Today.